Questionable Review: The Green Hornet

This review was originally posted on my ComicVine.com account as well as my Screened.com account. View those HERE and HERE respectively.

The new Green Hornet film is quite similar to the Frankenstein monster. Apart from the green motif that both possess, the two share a similar haphazard and patch-worked design. Where the poor creature in Mary Shelley's famous novel was sewn together with the dead remnants of human corpses, The Green Hornet is similarly composed of the rudimentary tropes of several different film genres. Is it a comedy? Is it an action film? Is it an action comedy? A buddy cop movie? Unfortunately, it doesn't even seem like the movie itself knew the answer to any of these questions, as despite some moments of genuine cohesion and quality, the movie just becomes an uneven jumbled mess. However, is it an entertaining and lovable mess, or is this monster beyond redemption.

SO WHAT'S THIS MOVIE ABOUT?

The Green Hornet is the tale of the incomparable Britt Reid (Seth Rogen). Despite growing up in the lap of luxury, Britt has never felt any sort of affection or sense of worth from his father (Tom Wilkinson), so when he dies from mysterious means leaving Britt his legacy as a newspaper mogul, Britt uses his new-found independence to prove his dad wrong by helping his troubled Los Angeles. Naturally, this means he decides to become a masked vigilante, posing as an aspiring crime lord in order to strike at the heart of corruption in the city. Of course, this would be the case if Britt was any shade of competent, instead relying on his father's mechanic, an engineering whiz, martial arts master and all-around bad-ass named Kato (Jay Chou). The duo soon find themselves in over their heads and stalked by the self-conscious kingpin of L.A., Chudnofsky (Christoph Waltz). With the help of Britt's secretary, Lenore Chase (Cameron Diaz), the Green Hornet and Kato have their work cut out for them as they clumsily unravel a web of secrets and lies that may lead back to Britt's father himself.

SO WHAT'S GOOD ABOUT THIS MOVIE?

When Green Hornet is going for a straight "action-comedy" vibe, it genuinely works really well. Seth Rogen does a great job bringing his trademark humor to bear, and their are quite a number of straight slap-stick gags that are really funny. In fact, the humor and action that makes up the majority of the movie's first 1/3 and final minutes would have made for a much better movie if that tone had been consistent throughout. The action itself was quite good in its own right, mostly thanks to the martial arts stylings of the Kato character. Jay Chou is inevitably going to draw similarities to Bruce Lee's portrayal of the character from the short-lived television show, but I think that'd be unfair to both performers. Chou's Kato is charming, confident, and fun, nothing more nothing less, and he's arguably the best part about this movie. Christoph Waltz also does a phenomenal job as Chudnofsky, a villain so concerned what others think about him he dons an entirely new persona during the movie's finale. Lastly, it should be mentioned that Cameron Diaz actually does do a good job with a role that there honestly wasn't much to. She's superfluous, to be sure, but she does enough to distinguish herself as an extremely likable member of the cast.

SO WHAT SUCKS ABOUT THIS MOVIE?

The fact of the matter is that its inability to come together as a cohesive experience kills Green Hornet. Too often does it meander for too long of stretches into the realms of straight action or straight comedy and everything in between. The middle of the film is paced so poorly that, by chaotic final moments, you'll be wondering what the hell took so long to get to such a simplistic climax. The movie isn't full with enough plot points or proper character development to merit a lot of its padding, and one scene in particular, an excruciatingly long fight scene between Rogen and Chou, is probably the biggest evidence that, at some point, the filmmakers just ran out of significant things to make these characters do. What's also puzzling is the often manic and surreal visuals in place during the action sequences. Sometimes they work, but they're used so inconsistently that when one does pop up, it's more jarring than doing anything to add to the flair of the film. Also, I question the direction they decided to take Britt Reid, the main character, in this movie. He's almost insufferably unlikable at points (only managing to stay tolerable because of Seth Rogen), and the tired gag of "KATO DOES EVERYTHING WHILE THE GREEN HORNET FUMBLES AROUND" quickly grows tired. Some films have story arcs. The Green Hornet's story more closely resemble stalagmites, with any sort of character revelation or quality plot development occurring in a quick and jarring shot which is just as quickly followed by a steep decline.

ANYTHING ELSE?

Green Hornet is definitely one of the comic characters I know the least about. Sure, one could argue there isn't much to the character's concept, but I'm sure there are some people out there who have strong feelings about the portrayal here.

SO WHAT'S THE FINAL VERDICT?

The Green Hornet, at the end of the day, is just too sloppy. Would it have been better if the film took a more serious thread throughout? Maybe. Instead, what we're left with is the wretched remains of what seem like several good ideas lumped into an uneven monstrosity. It certainly has the vague shape of an enjoyable movie, but there are innumerable blemishes that make it almost too ugly to witness. It isn't the worst, to be sure, but skipping it isn't a bad option either.